Friday, June 21, 2019

Movie Watching: I am Mother, The Nice Guys and Drive



Title: I am Mother
Director: Grant Sputore
Writers: Michael Lloyd Green
Network: Netflix

This is definitely one of the better Netflix originals, after the disappointment of both Titan and Mute. It's kind of a reverse Ex Machina, in which the humans have to convince a robot of their humanity. 

An android calling itself ‘Mother’ raises a lone girl (Clara Rugaard) in an underground bunker after an apocalypse wipes out the rest of humanity. Their relationship is tested when a woman (Hilary Swank) appears at the bunker door, with her own version of what is happening.

The first 2/3 were pretty tight, a bit like Cloverfield Lane, where the two main characters are shut in a box and you don’t know what’s going on in the outside world or who is telling the truth. The movie makes great use of its claustrophobic sets and the revelations unfold in interesting ways, especially once Swank’s character makes an appearance. The last 1/3 are kind of opaque though—the Daughter’s thinking in particular needed to be clearer, or better explained. As it is, her motivations appear to change two or three times without giving us a sense of why.

It’s an exercise in ethics, where in an early scene we see Mother giving the Daughter a class on morality, asking whether it is more ethical to save one healthy patient, or let them die so their organs might be used to save a number of others. This hypothetical scenario then plays out in real life, with the Daughter asked to choose between selfishness and utilitarianism.

Only ... the ‘selfish’ choice presented to the Daughter is fairly awful, and once the reality of the situation becomes clear, then there’s really no dilemma at all.

Still, a well-made and thought-provoking little film, and a step in the right direction for Netflix’s SF offerings.



Title: The Nice Guys
Director: Shane Black
Writers: Shan Black and Anthony Bagarozzi

This movie is sporadically hilarious, but tonally all over the fucking map, flipping from slapstick farce to buddy comedy to heartwarming family drama to black comedy and back to farce again. The plot is overly complex and, frankly, kind of beside the point, but anyway two private investigators in 1970s Hollywood try to track down a missing girl who has become embroiled in a conspiracy involving catalytic converters. Yeah, it’s a little odd. But really it’s just an excuse for the two stars to have some gonzo fun.

Ryan Gosling is fantastic as bumbling private eye Holland March, and Russell Crowe looks like he got real comfortable to play muscle-for-hire Jackson Healy, and you get the feeling these two had a blast performing together, but nothing really sticks with you because the movie changes gears every five minutes and kind of throws you around in your seat. 

Fun to watch, but really nothing more than that.



Title: Drive
Director: Nicolas Winding Refn
Writer: Hossein Amini (based on a book by James Sallis)

I’d watched Refn’s “Valhalla Rising” (the world's only 9-hour Viking movie with no dialog) and was expecting something slow-moving and arty, but this movie still managed to surprise me.

Like a piece of orchestral music, it’s got these quiet, idyllic parts that suddenly explode into action—the nameless Driver (Ryan Gosling) sits idly on a motel bed, before a window shatters in a slow-mo shotgun blast, and then we leap into furious violence—later the Driver and his neighbor Irene (Carey Mulligan) share a lingering, golden-lit kiss in an elevator, before the Driver turns around and stomps the head of another man into the ground, killing him.

Gosling is a bit one-note in this movie, essentially playing a preview of his character from Blade Runner 2049: monosyllabic, vulnerable yet tough superman. The bit part characters are more interesting: Breaking Bad's Bryan Cranston as a shady garage owner, Ron Perlman as a brutal gangster, Oscar Isaac as an ex-con.

My only complaint with this movie is the sound mix—the soundtrack is blaringly loud, the conversations mumbled and muted.

Friday, June 7, 2019

Liveblogging The Addams Family




Here we are again. At first, I thought this might seem a little mean-spirited, making fun of a comedy (it's SUPPOSED to be daft), but let's see how well this 1991 movie has aged...

1:00 carolers? This movie already as creepy af
Wait if they are caroling, why the hell they facing AWAY from the house? Literally unwatchable.
5/7


1:35 *snap snap*
The old boiling oil on the besiegers gag. Just like we used to do ... In the Crusades!

I hope the fuck-off huge scary-looking dude was not typecast as a huge scary-looking dude
(checks IMDb) Well, better luck in the next incarnation, my physically terrifying friend.


2:00 Ooh Christina Ricci.
Oh right she's like 40 now.
And was 12 then.
But in the middle there guys, mmmhmm.
 

3:11 Credits finally over ... Are long credits at the start a 90s thing? Have we as a species evolved beyond that?
Phoned-in credits too, font doing all the heavy lifting. Blow a bit of dry ice smoke, good enough, it's the 90s, these idiots will watch anything.
They can't even beat Saddam Hussein properly ffs
 

3:24 Motorboating grandfather clock. Now that's class.
 

4:22 Ah, disembodied hand, allow me to stand here and explain the backstory, even though you'd already know it.
The only story I know about Raul Julia, the only story I NEED to know is that he would later appear in a Street Fighter movie while dying of cancer, simply because his son loved SF and he wanted to go out on a movie his son would love.
He's like an early Keanu Reeves, only mortal
 

4:27 Christina Ricci! Rawr!
No wait she's still 12 here. Delete, delete
 

5:57 Despite their oddness, they're quite relatable characters really. He seeks to blot out the sun forever, just as I do
 

9:55 I feel like the movie keeps pausing you let you laugh. Only I don't.
I haven't laughed since mother died.
Shit was hilarious.
 

11:54 Pedophilia jokes, ho ho. You couldn't do that in this economy.
"Fine lunge, but your riposte, tut tut."
Dude just stabbed your chair and fell down Addams, WHAT RIPOSTE?
Literally unwatchable. 6/8
 

16:26 One liner. Indifferent action. One liner. Sight gag. One liner.
 

24:47 Keep waiting for Christopher Lloyd to shout "1.21 gigawatts!"
 

27:12 I don't want to know why the disembodied hand was in his room all night, or why he's got such a big smile on his face
 

36:20 Okay the electric chair bit was funny. Even I can appreciate a bit of cruelty to children.
 

54:48 Pyhyonesque combat sequence. It's like if Tarantino did a kid's movie. And how the hell is there still 40 minutes of movie.
 

57:00 Why'd the movie stop for a softcore sex scene? Because 90s G.
 

1:00:32 And now a Bollywood dance number. Movie is treading water.
 

1:04:00 Kenny from South Park puts in an appearance. Think It just said "I'm an admirer of Hitler".
Strong stuff for a PG movie.
 

1:08:00 Ok 'nother dance number, this time a cossack dance. It ain't treading water, it's drowning.
 

1:10:16 One minute he's chasing the daughter, then just like forgets and gets his sovietski groove on.
THIS ISN'T S8 OF GAME OF THRONES WE DEMAND CONTINUITY
 

1:20:40 He got a hand job. GET IT, A HAND JOB. AHAHAHAHA. Also he just rammed a stack of FedEx boxes up some lady's skirt.
 

1:34:12 1.21 Gigawatts!!!
Necromancy is a perfectly valid school of magic.
 

1:35:25 Hmm, overly long, reliant on sight gags and one liners. Would've worked better as some sort of visual medium, such as a prewar comic strip
 

8/11